Saturday, February 21, 2009
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sry, i can't help but be worried abt u, too many ppl have told me that they are ok, too many ppl have told me that they can handle their own problems, if that's the case, why do u still harness negativity? i'm in a fix right now XD
pray for me, i feel kind of lost without God
alfred thanked jesus at7:48 PM
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Starfield-Hands That Hold The World
No greater joy
Is there than this
To know for what
We're meant to live
To hold Your hand
To touch Your face
To find ourselves
In loves embrace
I want to stand before the King
Join in the song that heaven sings
I want to hold the hand that holds the world
I want to know the mystery
Reach out and touch the majesty
I want to hold the hand that holds the world
No greater love Could be bestowed
That You would name us as your own
Your daughters sing
Your sons rejoice
They gather here before Your throne
You are, You are
The author of creation
We are, the children of your heart
You are, You are, The light of all the heaven
We rise, to worship all You are
alfred thanked jesus at8:42 AM
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i just watched the everything skit on godtube.com(now change to tangle lerh). the video is so nice! i dunno why, but this time tears did not really feel my eyes, it brought back memories, memories of those that struggled & backsliden, memories of the mission trips i went, etc. i dunno why, but it just feels so different as compared to the first time when i watched the video.
if u guys are free, please do go to godtube.com and search up "everything-lifehouse church". do watch it if u want, i'm not forcing u. i think i'm gonna spend my free time looking up christian websites, not that i'm trying to be holy & all but i wanna grow, especially since i'm kind of going through a test now, so all the more i should be stronger. all of a sudden i have this over whelming urge to watch "facing the giants". if any of u have the dvd/vcd, please lend it to me!!! thank you in advance! :D
alfred thanked jesus at7:20 AM
Friday, February 20, 2009
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Lord! i want people to be true! true to me! i dun want ppl to be wearing a mask!
dunno why, i seem to think more at night, i seem to go deeper in thought, lolz...
i'm still very bored at home each day, hahas, i'm still sleeping late. recently there's noone to sms when i'm bored also XD
i really need to not sleep at 2am! XD not that i'm tired, but i am raelly just slacking away & doing nothing with the time i'm given.
haix... so many thoughts in my mind now... i see ppl drowned in their sorrows, yet are unwilling to share. XD ok, maybe i was wrong to have expected ppl to share their problems. cause the focus should not be on man, but on God. i should have instead asked for their prayer request. right? as much as i know, most of the ppl around me are not genuine, most of them are fakes, nothing more than just a performer that's hiding behind their mask.
alfred thanked jesus at7:02 AM
Wednesday, February 18, 2009
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i just realised i have unknowingly neglected some of my brothers & sisters in christ. no doubt i have fellowshipped with some, but at the same time, i have also neglected some. as God entrust me with my new "job scope" i shall trust God that He will bless me. i know that i am unable to reach out to everyone, so i thank God that He used another brother of mine to look out for those that i've neglected. even as i've said that i wanted to see hearts & speak lives, He has already assigned me ppl to reachout to & people that i can "practise" on. thank God. He knows what i've been through, He knows that i've experienced ppl telling me they wanna die, He knows that i've exprienced ppl telling me that they wanna backslide, He knows that i've seen ppl backsliding. He knows my pain each time i speak to such ppl, but yet at the same time, He constantly empowers me, making me stronger each time round. as of now i can't say that i'm leading a 100% holy & godly life, but i dare to say that i'm striving to achieve it. though i'm not exactly a "ppl-orientated" person, but He granted me the ability to understand without exchanging much verbal speech. He used my not so wonderful life to make the life of others better. He made me who i am today. i know that i've not been exactly a wonderful brother, i know that i've "betrayed the trust" of many seriously, after someone have told me their problems, 75% of the time i would be at a lost of what to do & how to help them. i know that sometimes i try to help, in the process of helping u, i destroyed something between us, either the friendship between us, the trust u had for me or something else, somehow, after u told me ur problem, its like a glass wall would be established between us. that's something i wanna change. i dun wish for our friendship to be at stake whenever someone tells me his/her problem.
Anw, i'm now still at the training stage, i'm praying everyday now, praying that i will continue to grow & grow stronger, brighter & brighter each day. till the day that i become nothing more than a "puppet" for the Lord to use
alfred thanked jesus at5:39 PM
Monday, February 16, 2009
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i think i understand u a little bit better now, but i still dun really understand the situation though. i got like super worried when u sms-ed me saying u wanna talk, i mean u have sms-ed me in the past, but somehow, this time it was different. but then again, i kind of felt like that was the one time that i dun see any mask on you, i dunno, maybe i haven't really seek out the real u, i seriously have no idea. i just felt that u were true when u shared, like u have removed the mask.
at first when u told me, my first reaction was WOAH! cause i kind of felt... lied to? but then again, it seems like it ended as soon as it started, so i can't really blame u, also, what has happened has happened, nothing i do can change it. I thank God that u shared. seriously hope that u will grow more christ like day by day. i think i can see ur faith, its like the flame on a candle that is left out in the open, it wants to continue burning, but yet find it so hard to do so. anws, know that man will fail u but God will not.
just hope that you'll run to God in times of trials & prosperity :D
i'll be changing the link of this blog some time soon, cause i have not been emo for a very long time now, so i figured that i would change to URL & skin to something that fits, so from this point on this blog shall be a place where i reveal my heartfelt thoughts and not some emo stuffs or anything similar. also, as stated above, things here are my HEARTFELT THOUGHTS, so if u dun agree with anything, just let me know, cause afterall, it is just my opinion. also, should i blog about anyone else here, the person's identity shall remain a secret, unless u are the person, if not, i dun think any third party would know. ok, i'm off to blogskins.com to find a new blogskin! hahas
alfred thanked jesus at4:48 PM
